(Written February 19, 2024) 

“Take me to the Lakes where all the poets went to die,”- the lakes, Taylor Swift. 

Taylor has dropped tons, and tons of easter eggs regarding her new album and the fact that we picked them up but twisted them and misconceived them is just… Dumbfounding. R.I.P. my dignity. Only for a second though, ‘cause Taylor’s coming out with a new album! She announced it at the Grammys (check out my latest quick write for more info), and the world is going wild again. I have so many predictions and so much to say about her new project, my brain is spilling with thoughts and a million questions are stirring. If you’re looking for a fresh new perspective on this album, you’ve come to the right place! Feel free to press play, and tune in on… This. Sick. Beat.

Grunge folklore with a speck of Midnights or folksy, indie, rep that’s much cooler than yours?

TTPD is Taylor’s third black-and-white album and so far, her b&w albums are literal Swiftie heaven on earth. Reputation is just banger, followed by banger, and then another banger, sandwiched between an even better banger that bangs more than the very first banger. You feel like a new person every listen. Folklore, though? Don’t ask me about folklore or you’ll never hear the end. Like, ever. I’ll still be talking about it during your funeral procession. A lot of people say that they think TTPD will be like a grunge folklore or a folksy, indie, reputation, maybe touched up with a speck of Midnights. I’d love that and it’d be amazing but I also think it’ll be a totally different sound from what we’ve had before. I mean every album practically sounds different. Banjos and melancholy pianos on Taylor Swift, guitar solos on Fearless, up to six-minute songs on Speak Now, groaning cellos on Red, dopamine-inducing synths on 1989, villainous beat drops on rep, dreamy ballads on Lover, folksy, slow, sounds on folklore, pots and pans (??) on evermore, and electropop Midnights, the Tortured Poets could sound like anything. Endless opportunities to explore, which is why we’re exploring them today on This Sick Beat. TTPD sort of seems like it has this elegant feel, which is why I feel it might be a little classical and sophisticated. Midnights was mature in lyrics but the sounds were your typical electropop, so I think it could be a little classical, plus folksy, and sick beats, and you’ll get the Tortured Poets. That would be cool and I think Taylor could absolutely pull it off. She’s done rap, dubstep, pop, country, and even rock, what can’t she do? Although… TTPD could be her lost rock album, considering Speak Now is a soft pop-rock album and not fully rock. The biggest hints though, are the featured artists on the album. We’ve got Post Malone –interesting – and Florence + the Machine which just backs up my inferences completely. I have heard, like, zero songs from their discographies but Post Malone is listed as a hip-hop/rap and country artist while Florence + the Machine is purely rock. Folklore has one country song, which is just about close enough to how many country songs Post Malone has (he has zero, but they’re on their way), and reputation is an electropop and R&B album, with splashes of hip hop, trap, and EDM. Taylor has yet to do a mainly, full-on, rock album so TTPD could be all of these. In conclusion, the Tortured Poets will be (in my opinion) hip-hop with a little R&B, rock, and even some country up in there (possibly classicallll). Sounds pretty great, huh? Totally new sound while incorporating stuff she’s done before, and something pretty much completely new (no, the WANEGBT and Holy Ground rock versions don’t count). 

Track list and Theme!!

This probably has to be my favorite part of this article, because I can make predictions just based off titles! Here we’ve got the track list below:

1. Fortnight (feat. Post Malone)
2. The Tortured Poets Department
3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys 
4. Down Bad
5. So Long, London
6. But Daddy I Love Him
7. Fresh Out the Slammer 
8. Florida!!! feat. Florence + the Machine 
9. Guilty as Sin? 
10. Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?
11.  I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)
12. loml
13. I Can Do It With a Broken Heart 
14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived 
15. The Alchemy
16. Clara Bow
17. The Manuscript (Bonus Track)
18. The Bolter (Bonus Track)
19. The Albatross (Bonus Track)

I’ve tried not to watch any videos or read any articles about theories for the track list just yet because I’d like a fresh perspective for this article. Hopefully, I can provide that. Let’s not waste any time and drive straight ahead. *Disclaimer: I’ll only be reviewing some of the song titles.*

For Fortnight – not Fortnite – let’s go into what the word itself means. A fortnight is just a fancy (British) way of saying two weeks. This track is already puzzling but it could mean multiple things, the first being that that’s how long Taylor hadn’t seen a certain someone. Yes, I am assuming it’s Joe (Joe Alwyn, that is. If you don’t know him, he’s Taylor’s ex and a British actor; search him up). This album doesn’t look like a Lover Part 2 and she’s been working on it for like, 2 years, so it couldn’t be anyone else (she’s DONE reminiscing on exes before Joe). It could also be about how she felt just two weeks after they broke up, or any other things that happened a fortnight ago, etc. I don’t have a lot to say about this but I think it’ll be sad. Now this second one got me thinking about the title tracks of every album, since it’s the title track. Any one of those Swifties that have a more or less Taylor Swift-hardwired brain and have partaken in clownery should be able to crack this Swiftie math (I promise I don’t do this on a daily basis nor for fun, it was for the story, I’m not crazy). It’ll definitely help resurrect your reputation (Taylor’s Version) theories I’m sure…

     
Hope you were able to read my handwriting! 😁

Moving on, MBOBHFT (track 3) is most likely about how he (Joe) only hurts the people he loves/d the most. I mean we can all relate to that can’t we? I think what she’s trying to say is that he hurt her because he loved her, and not that he hurt her because he wanted to. It’s sad, but it makes sense. She was his favorite toy, and he broke her. Now, if you know anything about TS track lists, you know that track five is a special track. The Track Five of each album is supposed to be the saddest and/or most vulnerable song on the album. Cold As You, White Horse, Dear John, All Too Well, AYHTDWS, Delicate, The Archer, my tears ricochet, tolerate it, and You’re On Your Own, Kid, they all have that devastating and/or vulnerable element in them that makes them special. Now we have So Long, London and I have a feeling it’s gonna be one of the most tear-jerking ones. From London Boy to So Long, London, where do we go now? Only April 19th will tell. “But Daddy, I love him!” Classic rom-com lines or just crucial lines in a teenage girl’s life. It’s giving Love Story in the most baffling ways. Is it gonna be all hopeful and delulu, or wistful? Florida!!! This one’s interesting because apparently the first show Taylor played after the world found out that her and Joe were, well, Joever, was in Florida. My best guesses are a Hits Different-type rock moment. Furthermore, Hits Different very much backs up this inference and hints at this track, stating, “Freedom felt like summer then, on the coast/ Now the sun burns my heart, and the sand hurts my feelings.” Meaning, Taylor felt free in Florida, even with a broken heart. Who’s Afraid Of Little Old Me? Everyone, Taylor. Everyone. I think that this one is about how Joe loved Taylor for Taylor (Delicate) because he didn’t care that she was The Taylor Swift, but then they broke up because she was The Taylor Swift. He just couldn’t handle it, and her fame caught up to him. It’s almost like she felt belittled. I’d say, go watch the Swiftologist’s video on the Tortured Poets tracklist and look at this track because he explains it pretty well (I said I TRIED to refrain from tainting my perspective, not that I succeeded). I feel that this track goes hand in hand with The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived. “I can fix him!” “Suuureee.” “No really, I can!” It’s something we all think, but the truth is, you can’t. What I thought of when I saw this track title – I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) – was Olivia Rodrigo’s song “get him back!”, when she says “well I am my father’s daughter, so maybe I can fix him.” Olivia’s dad is a therapist, so that’s the context of that. “Loml” stands for “love of my life,” so she could be referring to the fact that she thought Joe was the love of her life. For some reason, though I haven’t even heard it, I thought of Conan Gray’s song “(Online Love)” and I don’t even know why. I have this feeling that loml is gonna sound like Julia Michaels’ “Sorry To Me Too” or even just have that sort of vibe. I Can Do It With A Broken Heart, yes you can Taylor, and she did. I mean again, Zach (the Swiftologist) really explains this well and so did this video I saw about what the track could be about. She did the Eras Tour and performed with a broken heart for months, often seen tearing up during songs about Joe or sad songs, or singing songs about him or love angrily. The one that stood out to me was Cornelia Street and the way she sang it as a surprise song. She sang it angrily and was seen tearing up during the song. Taylor took her broken heart and put it in a drawer. She did all that with a broken heart so I can see what the track may be about. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived, as I said, is a song I feel goes hand in hand with  WAOLOM because I mean isn’t that why they broke up? Or partially why? Because Taylor Swift the businesswoman, the singer-songwriter, the brand, had finally caught up to Joe. Maybe he felt belittled also and couldn’t handle being the Smallest Man Who Ever Lived. Clara Bow was an American actress who rose to stardom during the silent film era. “Silent film era” is what the album aesthetic is giving, but other than that, I can’t really say anything because I don’t know much about Clara. It could be a little TLGAD moment, lyrically. Now this next one is interesting. The Bolter has a double-meaning as well. It could mean a bolter, as in someone who bolted, or ran. Someone who escaped. Like, she/Joe bolted from the relationship. On the other hand, it could also mean something less known. Bolter as in escaped convict – search it up. So maybe Taylor is talking about herself and how she was imprisoned (hence the “convict” part) but she has now escaped (hence “escaped”), and maaaybe she was wondering whether it was worth it or not, and where does she go from here, like an escaped convict? I wouldn’t know what that feels like though. I kind of have high expectations for this one… Lastly, The Albatross. In all honesty, I immediately thought of the Amulet books. If you’ve read the first book you know what I mean. I did try doing some research (who seriously already knew what “albatross” meant beforehand?) and here are the three options. A) [The subject] causes you great problems from which you cannot escape, or they prevent you from doing what you want to do (most likely), B) a psychological burden that feels like a curse (similar to the first), and C) a large white ocean bird that has very long wings. It’s interesting though, because this could be two things, and I’m expecting both in the song. Joe was Possibility A from the ones I just listed, but her fame was Possibility B from the list. The craziest thing is that the first thing on Google that shows up for “albatross meaning” is the following. 

1. : a large white ocean bird that has very long wings. 2. : a continuing problem that makes it difficult or impossible to do or achieve something. “Fame has become an albatross that prevents her from leading a normal and happy life.”

The last sentence is a crazy possibility that is oh, so very possible. Both fame and Joe were albatrosses in her life and it’s just mind-blowing what a little Google search can do. *The Black Dog edition was announced after I wrote this but… A black dog is a representation of depression. That’s all I can say. Stay tuned for my TTPD album review in April, though!* To wrap this up, the tracks I’m the most excited for are Who’s Afraid Of Little Old Me (hee-hee!) + The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived, So Long, London, I Can Fix Him, loml, The Bolter, and The Albatross. What tracks are you excited for? I’d say feel free to share your thoughts but…

Center Stage Or Kicked To The Cleaning Cart?

Welcome to the Eras Tour! Wait. Rewind…

We’ve come to the final predictions for The Tortured Poets and so we’ve got to answer the big question. Will Taylor add a  TTPD set to the Eras Tour, or will she simply play the songs as surprise songs and keep the current track list? The truth is: it’s complicated. On one side, it wouldn’t exactly be fair to the previous concert attendees if they added a TTPD set. Though, they should be grateful they got to attend the concert at all. It would be a good marketing strategy – I’m actually pretty sure that most tickets are sold out, but there are definitely some tickets on reseller websites out there – because more people will wanna attend the shows to see the Tortured Poets set live. It’s still a possibility that she will add that set though because she added Long Live to the Speak Now set, didn’t she? I mean it is the only song that has been added but there’s a 50-50 chance. Okay, 35-65 chance seems a little more realistic, because there are loooots of cons with this possibility. Longer concert, more choreo to add, unfairness to previous concertgoers, etc. Pros: good marketing strat, cooler concerts, bigger experience. I just don’t know which outweighs which (just kidding, the first for sure, I’m just giving you false hope and feeding your delusions). I mean, I’m not going to the Eras Tour anytime soon it’s not like it really matters to me, but in my honest opinion, I think Taylor is gonna play the TTPD songs as surprise songs and promote the new album in many other ways. Even more than her other albums because she has to make up for it. I wouldn’t complain either way though. Knowing Taylor at this moment, she’s been pretty into mashups recently and, depending on what sounds TTPD is giving, Taylor could mashup some of the set list songs with the new songs. Taylor has so many options and which ones she chooses are out of our control, so don’t try to. I think overall, everyone should just be grateful that Taylor is putting out this new album, our only job is to return the favor, stream it, enjoy it, and go on this journey with her. There are some Swifties who think they can get what they want, when they want it, and life doesn’t work that way. So as a fan just have fun and don’t go complaining. Be grateful. 

Other Perspectives, Lyric Leaks, and More

Well, those were my final predictions for the article but that’s not the end of it! Luckily, there is an abundance of opinions, perspectives, and predictions for this album all over the Internet. I tried to refrain from reading or watching videos about Taylor’s new album to avoid tainting my perspective, but you can’t ignore the Swiftologist, you just can’t. The only long-form video I’ve watched was Zach’s (the Swiftologist) on his predictions based off the track list, though he got two titles wrong because I don’t think he was wearing contacts, but yeah. There are also some leaks for some of the song lyrics that I accidentally stumbled across. I don’t think it’s right to leak Taylor’s new stuff, considering how hard she worked on it  (two YEARS) but I’d say if you don’t appreciate the leaks, just ignore them, don’t go reporting this YouTuber – TacoBellFan22 is a closeted Swiftie in disguise I believe, and she makes more or less enjoyable content, so I’d actually suggest checking out some of her content – or threatening them, or really anything of the sort. I don’t necessarily appreciate the leaks but if that’s something you’re interested in, nobody’s stopping you. Feel free to check out either of the links below, and if you haven’t already, go check out my other stories, there’s always another Taylor Swift story out there. Unlike many other Swifties out there, my whole world doesn’t revolve around Taylor Swift, so don’t hesitate to check out my other non-TS related stories! Thanks for reading, I really do appreciate it! “The Tortured Poets Department” by Taylor Swift, out Friday, April 19th, 2024 at 11 p.m. CST!!!

–We NEED to talk about the tortured poets department TRACK LIST || Swiftologist

–TacoBellFan22 || TTPD lyric leaks from Community Posts (unfortunately, I couldn’t access Community Posts so here’s the second best thing I could find!)

🤍

Bonus!! 

⭐ Piecing Together the Phrases from Each Variant Cover

Congrats, you’ve found bonus content at the bottom of my story! I know that I already wrote enough, but oh well. Click off if you don’t wanna read, and take a seat if you want to delve into more clownery with me! Now, if you’ve noticed, each cover that comes with the track list for each variant has a phrase at the bottom. There are 4 phrases total. We’re gonna analyze each of these phrases swiftly. 

• File Name: The Manuscript- “I love you, it’s ruining my life.”
• File Name: The Bolter- “You don’t get to tell me about ‘sad.’ ”
• File Name: The Albatross- “Am I allowed to cry?”
• File Name: The Black Dog- “Old habits die screaming.” 

So I’ve heard that these phrases are actually the titles of poems that go along with each variant of TTPD. This is actually new info but it’s nice because we should expect poems from a poet, right? I’m not gonna search for leaks but we need different ways to interpret them, since Taylor would like us to connect her music/writing to things in our life, and not have a universal meaning for each of her songs (or poems). I didn’t quite have time to interpret the poems myself, so I put my resources to use and asked the trusty ChatGPT to interpret the poem titles for me. You can check out the four AI-written poems here: ChatGPT – Heartbreak in poetic style

And you’re welcome. You should be thanking me. Yes, I know I’m amazing. You’re very welcome.